working with adults

Inner balance, visible strength

A healthy state of body and mind is the result of inner balance. It shows as calm, confidence and curiosity. When we are at our best, we can socially engage, tackle work and embrace life. Sebastian promotes noticeable change through counselling, coaching and therapy.

“My clients typically want to address unhelpful patterns in personality, lifestyle and relationships. They value a personal yet professional bond of mutual respect, genuineness and unconditional positive regard.”

Sebastian Droesler

You might experience symptoms of stress, emotional imbalance, change & adjustment, difficult relationships, performance blockages, setbacks in health & fitness, career challenges, lack of mental clarity, unhealthy lifestyle, isolation and meaninglessness, cluttered life, unresolved trauma or other unfinished business.

Counselling for calm, coaching for clarity

Counselling balance pebbles calm

Contact Sebastian to help you with psychological challenges, to improve structure or to regain and maintain healthy relationships.

With more than 12 years in counselling, coaching and therapy, Sebastian tailors interventions to enhance your inner balance and outer strength.

Let’s invite calm and clarity back into your life and work!

Counselling, Coaching and Psychotherapy

Sebastian’s counselling and therapy focuses on the psychology and internal processes of experience and well-being. Whereas his coaching and life-coaching is geared towards measurable change of behaviour, habit formation and performance improvement.

Talking therapy integrates with body and mind awareness. Clients often benefit from breathing exercises, practicing mindfulness and psycho-education about the regulation of the autonomic nervous system in addition to dialogue and enquiry.

Counselling

How can Counselling help you?

Counselling is a talking therapy to address difficult emotions, adverse life events, attachment history as well as mental and physical health issues. As a counsellor Sebastian applies the latest science in counselling psychology. He is certified in evidence-based approaches with the highest levels of safety and success.

Creating a safe place is key to address a client’s issues and challenges. It equips a person with tools, techniques, insights and new perspectives. The counselling process also provides mental strategies and behavioural health for sustainable well-being.

In order to best help you work through your distress Sebastian has trained internationally in a broad range of programs. Therefore he integrates neuroscience, cognitive-behavioural and emotion-focused therapy as well as profoundly researched meta-cognitive and mindfulness-based practices.

Counselling applies when you are feeling … stressed, stuck or depressed, nerveless or irritable anxious, concerned or experience panic angry, short tempered or impatient ready to confide or confess unhappy, unfulfilled or unfaithful facing obsessive thoughts or compulsive behaviours rigid or perfectionistic unable to “waste” time leading an unhealthy lifestyle, experiencing unrest or sleep badly

Coaching

How can Coaching help you?

Coaching focuses on the positive or growth aspects of life and work. It enables people to benefit from their full potential and to live life with more zest. The approach uses the strengths and mindset to enhance personal development.

Sebastian’s goal is to support you in achieving greater confidence and improved personal effectiveness. As a result he tailors coaching interventions to your individual needs. Helping you to reclaim control over your direction in life and to proactively advance.

With a strong solution-focus he prioritises your needs whilst acknowledging your responsibilities towards others. This in order to better manage the pressures and challenges you are facing. Taking into account that your life is a fabric of numerous roles, demands and expectations.

Coaching applies when you feel that your … performance needs a sustainable boost, life-balance is at stake, need to refresh your confidence, career needs calibration, priorities are changing in life and at work, lost sight of your values and motivators, lost identity in life and at work or crave calling, purpose, meaning and fulfilment

Psychotherapy

How can Psychotherapy help you?

Psychotherapy or simply “therapy” is a talking therapy based on a strong working alliance between the client and the therapist. Mutual respect, a safe and confidential environment – in face-to-face meetings or online therapy – and an informed process are foundational characteristics.

As a therapist Sebastian applies several forms of therapy depending on the issue at hand. Oftentimes clients respond well to more formalised and structured approaches like Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Neurotherapy and Acceptance and Commitment Training. Other challenges require more “open” interventions like Mindfulness Meditation, Brainspotting and Neurotherapy for example due to traumatic content.

A clinical diagnosis by a GP or psychiatrist may also influence the choice of psychotherapy, for example for mood disorders, depression, anxiety disorders, phobias, sleep disorder, recovery from illness or after surgery and stress due to other major adjustments in life.

Counselling Coaching Therapy

The pandemic has lifted concerns about online therapy. We can now treat remotely, yet connect closely! The technology is safe and effective.

Choose between online meetings via ZOOM and in-person consultations in his office in Central Hong Kong! The service provided is the same. However, online sessions offer more scheduling flexibility in the early mornings and evenings and for different timezones.

Typical Cases for counselling, coaching and therapy

  • 55y-old male dealing with challenging transitions around semi-retirement, family drama, empty nest and the desire to rekindle his marriage.
  • 31y-old female dealing with anxiety, post-traumatic stress and assertiveness in her ambitious early career phase while struggling to break free from a critical upbringing.
  • 38y-old male dealing with debilitating depression for the second time within 4 years potentially threatening his first long-time relationship, professional development and his pursuit of meaning and purpose.
  • 42y-old female dealing with the emotional grip of an egocentric and critical mother leaving her feeling guilty and unlovable.
  • 46y-old male dealing with burnout and the lack of appreciation at work and in his family of origin.
  • 46y-old female dealing with the loss of both parents and the process of grief and reflection.
  • 36y-old female struggling to set boundaries at work and in relationships.
  • 35y-old male struggling how to show up in a long-term committed relationship.
  • 40y-old male tormented by his religious upbringing vs self-acceptance

Evidence-based Approaches to counselling, coaching, therapy

The approaches Sebastian has trained in have all in common to be humanistic and person-centred. His aim is to enable your innate motivation and potential. Therefore he is combining cognitive and behavioural as well as mindfulness-based and emotion-focused perspectives.

His work takes into account that our state of mind has the power to govern the body and that often the state of the body governs the mind. Read more about CBT, ACT, Schema Therapy, MBCT, polyvagal therory, EFT, Brainspotting and attachment theory here …

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy – CBT

Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) is the psychotherapy and counselling with the most solid and wide evidence base for efficacy and effectiveness. Today’s CBT was strongly influenced by Behaviour Therapy (1950s & 60s) and Cognitive Therapy (1960s & 70s). Behaviourists focus on the learning connection between stimuli and responses. The cognitive model in therapy and counselling emphasises mental processes.

The cognitive model explores thoughts, beliefs and interpretations which influence our specifically individual responses. Areas of interest for CBT counsellors and psychotherapists are cognition, emotion, behaviour and physiology which form an interacting system.

CBT’s general focus lies on stressful states such as depression, anxiety phobias and anger which are often perpetuated or exacerbated by biased ways of thinking. Negative Automatic Thoughts and Core Beliefs is examined in their meaning and tested against “reality”.

ACT and Schema Therapy

Acceptance and Commitment Training

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a metacognitive approach which emphasises that all thoughts are first and foremost mental events. It uses mindfulness to become aware of what goes on in our minds and bodies. The target is to build our mental muscles called “attention” and “awareness”.

ACT training and therapy regulates difficulty, discomfort and distress in the way we relate to our negative experience. A goal of this therapy is to help clients to cope with interfering thoughts and emotions. Well-Being is promoted through changing and persisting of behaviour in order to achieve and maintain valued living.

Similar methods and concepts are found in Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) and Cultivating Emotional Balance (CEB), which Sebastian uses as a counsellor and psychologist, helping clients to gain presence and mental strength.

Schemata and Life-traps

Schemas are unhelpful conceptual patterns in our thinking, feeling and behaviour that we typically acquired through experiences in life, like upbringing and traumatic events. A person for example, who’s father divorced the mother and left the family at an early age, might have developed an abandonment schema. As result, the person internalises unhelpful beliefs like “people you love and need, will leave you”.

Because of the negative influence schemas can have of everyday life, relationships and work performance they are also called life-traps. 18 of these traps have been identified and are expressed on a scale or dimension. So the question is less if you are affected by a schema, but more how much are you affected by it.

Brainspotting and Polyvagal theory

How can Brainspotting help you?

This non-invasive form of therapy treats performance blockages and psychological trauma. Brainspotting (BSP) is safe and does not require the client to share or speak about their experience or any memories. Similar to EMDR this method applies bilateral stimulation of both brain hemispheres.

Based on the finding that “where we look, is how we feel” BSP aims at locating individual “brainspots”. Therefore the therapist or counsellor guides the client to use the brainspots. Processing happens on a deeper level than talk therapy as it involves the limbic system and the anterior cingulate cortex.

Talk therapy often relies heavily on reasoning and sense-making which might get in the way of accessing and processing learned but maladaptive protection and survival patterns. With the BSP approach non-verbal ways of healing become available.

How can Polyvagal Theory help you?

The vagus nerve relates to our capacity to function as social beings through maintaining our emotional regulation, fear response and social connections. We all constantly cycle through stages of disconnection, mobilisation and social engagement.

This part of the autonomic nervous system connects the brain with the heart and other major organs and runs on autopilot without requiring intervention. The ANS regulates our heartbeat, breathing and other autonomous body functions such as digestion, body temperature and sexual arousal.

Stress responses are essential for our survival, but need to be tamed to enable social engagement and well-being. Our Autonomic Nervous System adapts protection and connection from moment to moment. These patterns of protection can compromise our social engagement system.

A bundle of nerves to rule them all: Unpacking the vagus nerve.

Coaching structure

Coaching clients with a structured approach

Sebastian applies a standardised assessment tool to capture the bright side, the dark side and the values and motivators of your personality. With or without this inventory, he will set your baseline alongside the following structure: Initial assessment of your challenges, followed by setting goals and enforced by reviewing progress.

Assessing your reality

A. Strengths and Resources

Sebastian recommends that you use the Hogan Personality Inventory (HPI) to assess exactly strength and resources.

Coaching your bright side

When looking into yourself from a coaching perspective, you want to know how you perform on a regular basis and how other people would typically perceive you on a day to day basis.

Sebastian recommends that you use the Hogan Personality Inventory (HPI) to assess exactly that. It describes normal, or bright-side personality – qualities that describe how we relate to others when we are at our best.

Whether your goal is to develop as a stronger leader or to find out about your reputation, assessing normal personality gives you valuable insight into you work, how you lead, and how successful you will be.

B. Challenges and Risks

Sebastian suggests that you conduct the Hogan Development Survey (HDS).

Coaching risks in your behaviour

In order to get a better understanding of the risks in your behaviour, Sebastian suggests that you conduct the Hogan Development Survey (HDS).

The HDS describes the “dark side” of personality – qualities that emerge in times of increased strain and can disrupt relationships, damage reputations, and derail peoples’ chances of success.

By assessing dark-side personality, you can recognise and mitigate performance risks before they become a problem.

C. Values and Driving forces

The Hogan Motives, Values, Preferences Inventory (MVPI) is his inventory of choice.

Coaching according to your motivators and preferences

At the core of all valued living and exceptional performance lies a profound understanding of your motives and preferences. Sebastian thinks that it is as key to his clients as it is to himself, to have deep knowledge of the roots of your being.

Therefore the Hogan Motives, Values, Preferences Inventory (MVPI) is his inventory of choice. It describes personality from the inside – the core goals, values, drivers, and interests that determine what we desire and strive to attain.

By assessing values, you can understand what motivates you and others to succeed, and in what type of position, job, and environment you will be the most productive.

Setting goals based on …

  1. Contrasting what you see and what others see in you
  2. Understanding your personality on high level and in detail
  3. Putting your behaviour into relational context

Continuously reviewing your progress while …

  1. Giving yourself permission to be the way you want to be
  2. Identifying challenges and road-blocks
  3. Keeping track of your priorities and constraining factors