What I am hearing over and over from men of all walks of life with all kinds of professions, sexual preferences, educational, cultural and family backgrounds – is, that they seem to be unable to overcome the distractions of modern life in general and expat life in particular.
They repeatedly fail to stick to what they actually intend to do. What most people want to change in their lives can often be brought down to day to day behaviour: Going to bed earlier, going to bed when tired, eating less, eating more healthy, spending less time at work and more time with partners and family – to name a few.
Most men report to be desperate to stick to their goals, introduce a healthy routine of physical workout, adhere to healthy sleep and eat what is right.
Most of these goals fall into one of two categories: limiting consumption and living healthier lives.
In addition to that, they want to overcome the unsurmountable Mordor of procrastination. Often this means to fight a battle with passivity in order to make space for the cultivation of activity.
When I run men’s groups I enjoy the dynamic of having around 8 grown up men in a room for two hours in a non-BS environment. That means not in a bar, not showing off and not competing. Instead it means being yourself, listening to challenges and tuning in with each other’s experience of life.
From these groups I learned a great deal about what men in general go through and how to best support them. While the questions for many people seem to be similar in nature, the answers are entirely individual.
Motivation is essential. To get a life back and to keep it alive. Why you make choices the way you do is a valid and very helpful question. The mental strategiesn measures of change in your behaviour are most effective and sustainable when you customise them according to your circumstances.